Give yourself permission

It is very easy, as a parent or carer, to prioritise the needs of your family and others ahead of your own wellbeing.  But taking time for yourself is not selfish.  Everybody needs space to unwind and relax, and giving yourself permission to take some time to recharge your batteries means that you will hopefully have more energy and patience to meet the needs of your family.  Start by trying to give yourself 10 minutes each day where you can just sit down, have a cup of tea and take a breather.

Be kind to yourself

It may be that you also feel bad about yourself and feel as if you’re failing. If this is happening it can help to have a think about how you ‘talk’ to yourself.  We’re sometimes much harder on ourselves in our own thoughts than we would be to anyone else we speak to. Imagine that it’s a friend who’s in your situation right now instead of you. How would you comfort them? How would you encourage them? Can you speak encouragingly to yourself too? 

Make a to-do list

At times you might find that your ‘list of things to do’ can build up. This could be general errands, shopping for vital items, or general admin. If these tasks are weighing on your mind, compile a to-do list that you can tick off as you go along prioritising those activities which need to be done that day or week. This includes setting aside quality time with your children and time for yourself.  Just seeing everything written down may help make things seem more manageable and identify things which really aren’t urgent.  And remember it is fine and healthy to sometimes have a downday. 

Ask for help

Asking for help from others can sometimes feel as if we’re failing as a parent or carer but parenting can be tough and reaching out for support is nothing to feel ashamed of.  Whether it’s minding your child for a short time to allow you to get things done or running a small errand for you, friends and family will often be happy to help and children and young people can also benefit from knowing there are other trusted adults in their life that your family can turn to.  Depending on the age of the child, you can also ask them to complete age-appropriate tasks to help around the house to relieve you of some of the everyday tasks.